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April, 2011

  1. GEFILTE FISH, FINALLY!

    April 30, 2011 by The Yum Yum

    Please don’t misread the word and mispronounce it like I did the first time. I kept seeing, “geflite fish” instead of “gefilte fish.” It’s pronounced something like guh-fil-tuh.


    Luckily, Publix had it on sale this time, so I paid something like $4.50 for a whole jar of it!


    Gefilte fish is a Jewish food. To a Southerner, the only good comparison I can give is saying that’s akin to a boiled salmon patty. I’m not sure if any other explanation would do.

    But what I can say is that it’s absolutely delicious- especially if you add garlic and celery seed to it, along with some salt- that’s as per the instructions of my Jewish friend Shmueli.

    I know that the gefilte fish doesn’t look nearly as pretty as it could- but it’s delicious, absolutely delicious. Definitely try it!

    Beaux



  2. Grits: A New Trick!

    April 29, 2011 by The Yum Yum

    Somehow, last night possessed me to make grits. My father made some and messed them, and Bapaw’s sad bowl of grits inspired me to try a new trick I learned.

    Instead of using water to make grits, one should try using milk.

    Low and behold, the grits turned out to be magnificent!

    I used instant grits for my recipe.

    What you need:

    • two packages of plain instant grits or the equivalent amount of not-instant grits
    • 1 cup of milk
    • 1 teaspoon of butter
    • salt
    • pepper

    Heat the milk to just below boiling; add the butter and allow it to melt. Add the grits and stir profusely, removing from heat.

    Add salt and pepper to taste. In my case, I use a great deal of pepper; otherwise, these grits were too sweet for me.

    Normally, I’ve made grits only using water. However, the milk does the trick and makes them fluffier, the way grits are supposed to be. Dry grits are not fun- trust me on that.

    Also, remember that the grits will thicken as they cool!

    They’re definitely a great Southern treat.

    Beaux


  3. The Carboholic Strikes AGAIN.

    April 28, 2011 by The Yum Yum

    At work, I asked my father what he wanted for dinner.

    Bapaw doesn’t really become picky about too terribly much.

    We also don’t agree on too terribly much when it comes down to it.

    We have agreed that we hated that show Whose Line Is it Anyway? that came on years ago. Maybe it still comes on, I don’t know.

    So without Bapaw’s suggestions or hints, I made my way to the grocery store after work. I ran into some friends I haven’t seen in a while.

    Then I proceeded to be hit with the inner carboholic.

    I bought three packs of ramen, each pack containing six individual packs. That’s 18 packs of noodles total.

    I bought 2 Totino’s Pizzas.

    I bought 2 boxes of Pierogies.

    Good. GRIEF.

    But on the flip side, Bapaw did send me home with several vegetables-cucumbers, onions, and tomatoes. So my carbohydrates were just supplements, really, or so I like to tell myself.

    Right now, I really want some zucchini. I plan to make a zucchini and mushroom dish sometime in the near future.

    Lord, save me from my carboholism!

    Beaux


  4. On Why I Will Never Again Eat Cup Ramen Unless I’m Starving, and Even Then I May Choose Death

    April 27, 2011 by The Yum Yum

    Ramen’s one of those deliciously unhealthy foods that teenagers and 20-somethings love. Cheap, quick, and easy, this is the meal of choice for many college students. Some even become burnt out on it after eating it so often.

    Ramen poses a few problems, though. First, one brick of ramen is actually TWO servings. Personally, I’m of the opinion that the companies should just list the health information for two servings as one serving to avoid this confusion and the possibility of having to use mathematics to figure out how many calories one is actually eating. Also, I think it’s kind of false advertising, and let’s be honest with ourselves and the world: who actually eats only half a brick of ramen? Seriously? Do you know anyone that breaks it up and eats only half? No? I didn’t think so.

    Ramen also has multiple forms. There’s the brick ramen, of course, and then there’s…

    …cup ramen.

    Cup ramen has never been good to me. Ever. I initially ate it because it was a novelty and reminded me of Japan.

    But seriously, it’s awful.

    And tonight, the awfulness of cup ramen proved itself once more when I went to the kitchen, grabbed the cup ramen that’s sat in our pantry for over two years (if I had to estimate), and proceeded to try my fantastic Beaux magic on it.

    However, the wily creators of cup ramen are vastly superior in their Dark Culinary Arts than I am in my own Culinary Arts, and thus, I lost this battle miserably.

    How do I explain? I planned to boil the ramen in a sauce pan, so I made an Indian mixture that included curry and turmeric. The mixture turned out quite delicious, as a matter of fact.

    Then the ramen laughed at me as I tried to remove it from its styrofoam cup.

    So I went to the next best option- pouring the hot mixture into the cup and allowing it to sit for three minutes.

    I succeeded in dying the ramen yellow thanks to the presence of the turmeric. What I did not succeed in doing was flavoring the noodles in any way. Despite the hot sauce, despite the MSG, despite the profuse amounts of curry and turmeric,

    THE NOODLES WERE STILL BLAND!!!

    Three bites into the cup ramen, I cut my losses and threw the remainder of the noodles to the rest of Creation, my offering to the Divine Feminine and the Oneness of Life.

    I made a simple mistake, the mistake that so many Americans make: I allowed my hunger, combined with me instant gratification complex, to guide me to the most immediately available food. I would say that this, not an unhealthy diet, is the reason for obesity in Americans. We settle for just whatever is quickest because we’re responding to the hunger instinct inside of ourselves. Unfortunately, the unhealthy foods seem to be most readily available.

    Either way, this was my last tango with cup ramen. Though it ranks below “squash” on the Unholy List of Foods God Should Never Have Created, it has made the list none the less, which is a feat in itself.

    So go eat regular ramen and ask me how to cook it- I know how to make that stuff taste fantastic.

    Beaux


  5. Secrets of Gigi: Scrambled Eggs

    April 26, 2011 by The Yum Yum

    Somehow, Gigi’s scrambled eggs always turn out better than mine. Many of my dishes actually surpass and are more complicated than the mood she makes; scrambled eggs are universally renowned and loved for being easy and quick to make, and in spite of that, I still can’t get the formula down exactly

    My eggs almost always curdle too much; it appears that I over-cook them, thus leaving them in a state of not-quite-being fluffy.

    Gigi’s eggs always turn out fluffy and well-proportioned and not overcooked- the way eggs should be.

    Another thing I’m careful to do is to remove the eggs from the heat before they really finish cooking; the eggs will continue to set even after removed from the heat, so this is perfectly safe to do.

    My scrambled eggs usually include spices in them, including salt, pepper, garlic powder, and parsley. Sometimes I prefer cheese in addition to the spices.

    Were you aware that tomatoes go superbly with eggs? Try diced tomatoes to garnish your eggs or eating your eggs on top of a slice of tomato. Alternately, you can also add salsa to your eggs or even taco sauce. Ketchup, believe it or not, is a fantastic addition to the top of an omelet.

    Maybe one day Gigi will share her secrets of making perfect scrambled eggs. Cooking, though not an exact science, does contain small tips and tricks of the trade. I intend to know as many of these tricks as possible.

    Also, can I tell everyone how miserably I’ve failed at my “cooking challenge” involving Deborah Madison’s book Vegetarian Cooking for Everyone? She, unfortunately, suggests the use of those rare spices and ingredients that people living in Alabama may be unable to acquire, so I feel betrayed in some small way. That or my own fear of squash and tofu may be contributing to my inability to face the music.

    Carpe Diem!

    Beaux


  6. The Great Freezer Battle: More Exaggerations with Beaux

    April 25, 2011 by The Yum Yum

    For as long as I can remember, our freezer has been stuffed with frozen food, stuffed full to where you can’t put anything else in it unless you want to cause the entire freezer to spill out on you.

    I have been the unlucky victim in more than one such case.

    The problem is not that we have food in our freezer; in fact, having food stored in one’s freezer is quite wise, especially if you make an excess of something wonderful like spaghetti sauce. No, dear reader, the problem is that we never use any of the food in the freezer.

    For over two decades, food has been relentlessly stored in the freezer, never to be seen or heard from again.

    This is simply the reality I lived in.

    The freezer became fuller and fuller and fuller.

    Then one day, I bought some frozen food- mini-pizzas that I needed to put in the freezer.

    To my dismay, there was no room.

    Not only was there no room, the frozen food began taunting me. The main culprit leading the taunting was a bag of frozen squash.

    Squash.

    If you weren’t aware, squash and I are mortal enemies.

    Squash taunting you after being at work and coming home and just wanting to cook a nice frozen pizza to fill your stomach is not something you would enjoy, either.

    So the fight began.

    The vegetables leaped out of the freezer and chased me. I grabbed a spatula and a steak knife, speared several vegetables and flattened others and knocked a pork chop clear out the window when it decided to launch itself at me. A few peas shot at my face and tried to run up my nose, which was a mistake: I sneezed and blew them to smithereens.

    The frozen tomatoes did get a good lick at me, and so being covered in their remains made me look like I was covered in blood. Tomato blood. Ketchup?

    Then the squash came out, thinking that it would play Billy Bad Butt with me. I grabbed the entire bag and slammed it down on the floor, immobilizing it. Then I put my food in the freezer and pointed dauntingly at the squash.

    “I still haven’t decided what I’m going to do with YOU!”

    So ten minutes later, the squash had been pureed and made into soup.

    I cleaned up the kitchen, and Gigi never knew about the apocalyptic battle, at least not until now.

    Beaux



  7. Penne and Seven Cheese Sauce with Lobster: Beaux’s Spur-of-the-Moment Mealtime

    April 24, 2011 by The Yum Yum

    Earle and I made our traditional trip to Publix on Friday night after taking a hiatus for some two weeks or so. The last dinner I made from Publix turned out to be delicious, and the one before that was slightly disastrous.

    Last night, I did the absolute best I’ve ever done at Publix! Here’s what I bought:

    • 1 large organic sweet onion- $1.11
    • 1 container of Blue Cheese crumbles – $2.50
    • 1 bag of shredded Italian 6 cheese mix- $2.99
    • 1 pack of imitation Lobster meat- $2.99
    • 2 boxes of Penne (on sale!)- $1.39
    • Total: $11.97 (including tax)

    We also bought a pint of milk, the exact amount needed to make the cheese sauce.

    So, here’s what I did:

    1. I boiled 1 box of penne and added another 1/4 box to it. Unfortunately, I spilled that 1/4 of the box into the sink when draining it.
    2. I chopped the onion and sauteed it in butter until it began to caramelize, at which time I added the lobster meat. You can also use crab meat, and no matter what you use, I recommend using two packs instead of one.
    3. I removed the onion and lobster mix from the wok and then added 3 Tablespoons of butter and the pint of milk, heating it just below boiling, and then adding the blue cheese and the pack of Italian six cheese.
    4. After the sauce warmed and thickened with the melting cheese, I added the lobster and onions back to the mix, followed by the penne.
    5. The meal turned out to be pretty good after all was said and done, though it needed salt and pepper (but what doesn’t?)
    6. Also, I sprinkled bacon bits (the soy kind) on top of the mixture, too.

    My apologies for the lack of pictures; for whatever reason, I just never got around to taking a picture of the food.

    If you eat meat, this dish would be great with bacon in it; the bacon bits added a good flavor to it and tend to go with seafood.

    Carpe Diem!

    Beaux


  8. The Easiest Recipe in the World: Cole Slaw, a Delightful Treat

    April 23, 2011 by The Yum Yum

    Cole slaw may just be the best recipe I’ve ever posted on here because of how ridiculous easy to make it is.

    Cole slaw requires

    • a head of cabbage
    • a medium-sized onion
    • mayonnaise
    • salt
    • pepper

    What you do:

    • shred the cabbage
    • chop the onion
    • mix the shredded cabbage with mayonnaise
    • add salt
    • add pepper
    • chill in the fridge

    Go make some, right now! You know you want to! Sometimes, the simplest recipes are the best of all.

    Beaux


  9. Seafood Surprise!

    April 22, 2011 by The Yum Yum

    In our pantry, we’ve had an 8 ounce can of white crab sitting for over a year. Luckily, this kind of food does not spoil easily and was good to keep until next year.

    Lately, my burst of blogging had ceased- I’ve been sick on and off for the past two or three weeks, so now I have to try to get back into the groove of writing and catching up on writing blogs. Being ahead of the game is half the fun.

    Tonight, I did my magic again, going to kitchen, facing that can of white crab, and making something delicious out of it.

    Gigi’s cole slaw, which sat happily on the kitchen island, prompted this recipe.

    What you need:

    • 3 cups of cole slaw
    • 8 ounces of crab meat or imitation crab meat
    • 3 or 4 cups of salad shrimp
    • 1 large onion
    • 3 Tablespoons of Old Bay seafood seasoning
    • 3 Tablespoons of lemon juice
    • 1/2 cup English peas (optional)
    • Parmesan cheese to garnish
    • croutons -or- crushed cheese crackers
    • bacon bits -or- actual bacon to garnish

    Here’s what you do:

    • First, prepare the cole slaw and set it in the fridge to chill. I’ll post another blog specifying the rather easy process of cole slaw.
    • Chop the onion finely without outright mincing it.
    • Heat oil or butter in a large skillet.
    • When the skillet gets hot, add the onions and allow them to cook for a few minutes over medium heat.
    • Add the crab meat and the shrimp. Allow to cook for a minute to a minute and a half.
    • Add the Old Bay seasoning. Allow to cook for a few more minutes.
    • Add the lemon juice and English peas.
    • The onions should be tender, and the whole mixture should have reduced significantly at this point.
    • Remove from heat.
    • Spoon cole slaw into bowls, then add the seafood mixture. On top of that, sprinkle Parmesan cheese.
    • On top of this, add crushed cheese crackers. Serve and enjoy.

    I definitely recommend using the chunky pieces of imitation crab instead of using canned crab meat, because the texture is better and generally the meat is more flavorful.

    This recipe would also be good if made with a cream sauce and served over pasta.

    Carpe diem and happy eating!

    Beaux



  10. Coffee Houses and the Like: Where Do We Go From Here?

    April 21, 2011 by The Yum Yum

    My dream, for many years, has been to open and run a coffee house not unlike Wired. Coffee’s a delicious drink, after all, and I saw a good chunk of how the business itself is run.

    Since those days, different people, myself included, have speculated on what caused the Fall of the House of Coffee. My own opinion is that the financial fears increasingly forced from everyone’s hearts what Wired was actually about: a vehicle, a manifestation of Divine Love, a calling to hearts of the artist and the seeker from the Voice of God: “Come, come as you are.”

    In other words, the ideal, the purpose, the meaning that made Wired what it was became occluded with fear and confusion. President Obama said in his inaugural speech that what makes us Americans is ultimately “not this, not that” but our ideals. This point hammered straight through all political ilk, propaganda, and bias. We are not Americans by virtue of our heritage. We are not Americans by arbitrary choice. We are Americans because we have ideals of justice and liberty, peace and prosperity, and ultimately a movement forward to face the unknown with the helping hand of God- whatever you choose to deem “God” to mean.

    So long as we hold fast to our ideals as Americans, we can live out those ideals and pursue the American Dream.

    The parallel is that as long as Wired held its ideals, it would endure. But we lost the ideals, traded them for what security and whatnot, and look what resulted.

    I don’t mean to make light of the financial aspect of things or to say that there are no concerns in the outer world. What I mean to say is that the power of reality flows from the inside out, and that what we hold in our souls is what will manifest in the world. Thus, if we hold to the ideal of who and what we are, we will begin to see this appear in the world around us.

    Ideals are called ideals for a reason, for as they manifest, they take on a definite and specific form instead of being the generic and non-specific form.

    Wired’s inner world may have looked quite different, and then it took on the form of a simple coffee house. I recall one of the most staunchly atheist patrons of Wired later saying that we would be hard-pressed to go anywhere else and find the same kind of “energy” that we encountered there, and of course, he has been correct. I have personally looked long and hard, never having seen quite the same thing.

    Then the idea came to me that I should open my own coffee house. I understand the idealism of things, but the practical manifestation becomes more difficult. Where to get the capital? Where to get the workers? Decisions about aesthetics and menus are something that are within my grasp, and learning to actually prepare coffee and various foods, so, too, is within the realm of my own hobbies. Perhaps my expertise is in the focusing on the ideals, holding them firmly in my heart, but that doesn’t manage the books or pay the bills.

    The approach of kindness to the customer, of forging a relationship with each person as not only a special individual but also as a part of the greater whole of what would appear to the outer eye as a business- this is something I understand how to do. To welcome, to give hospitality, to make someone feel included- as these were certainly things neglected in my own life in my childhood and beyond, forcing into my awareness who is and isn’t included.

    Do you remember the commercials with the money man dressed in question marks? His name is Matthew Lesko, and he advocates that one can find grant money for all kinds of things. Years ago I read part of his book and did research on the matter.

    Matthew Lesko articulated the best thing about working I have ever seen: he said, point-blank, that no one really wants to be leisurely all the day. No one wants to be on vacation all the time. Rather, what we really want in terms of a career is to be able to fall asleep at night, tired from doing something we truly loved all day. That has influenced profoundly, and I can say without a doubt that working hard at something that you enjoy changes one’s approach to life.

    But let’s back up. The first step is finding money and a place to run a business, and of course, there is the ridiculous amount of red-tape through which one has to jump, as I experienced first hand with the opening of ReWired. Then there are other major considerations: finding a location with a high amount of traffic, finding a location where the neighbors aren’t going to complain forever, advertising, finding a particular company to supply the coffee and so on.

    Some people have suggested that one should only open a coffee house to run it as a business, pure and simple, but that’s exactly the problem: life is interconnected. People don’t visit coffee houses just to go buy coffee and a doughnut; the real deal of a coffee house is a place where one can go and have a social gathering; a coffee house sells its space, its venue, and that is precisely what will keep people coming back.

    The point is to give people something different, to market to them something that is rare and that they can’t get just anywhere else. I know the things that attracted me to Wired, and I suspect that other people will similarly follow suit.

    Furthermore, I have a crazy idea about not competing with other businesses but interlocking with them and helping them along the way. Treat people who are struggling kindly, and they will treat you kindly back. This is not a difficult concept to grasp.

    Oh, well, this may sound like a pipe-dream, but when I become a published author and become rich and famous, the Harris family name will go on to become synonymous with “coffee house.” Better to try looking at it optimistically than not!

    Please look forward to my next set of ramblings. I promise I’m not a Polly Anna.

    Beaux